[ hi , Illegal

We are what we think we are. If we think we are good. Then we are good, and if we think we are not good. Then we are not as we see things but perhaps not as others see things.
You have kept going despite all of the difficulties it takes a lot of courage perseverance and grit to do that because it is so difficult and losers do not have that quality. They simply give up. So perhaps the thing to do is to build confidence. Call to mind everything you have ever achieved, and that proves you are not a loser. Also set small baby step goals and their achievement will build confidence that you can do things and get them right. It is useful to have a purpose in life. That could be a charitable cause, or indeed something that fired you up in the past reconnecting with which could give real purpose to your life. I hope and pray today will be really good for you. Take care. God bless and best wishes from your friend Francis