Dear possibly former T and Pdoc, since things are up in the air with insurance and future covered providers, and Dear very first T from when I was 9 or 10,

My very first session at such a tender age began with "this is not your fault." At the time it angered me, I found it dismissive of my comprehension of the situation, at the time. And it perhaps struck a nerve with the condescending tonality that I was exposed to, albeit at the time too young to recognize. Had an aunt once question if it had to do with the age bracket he was exposed to educating, but that's a digression of a more complex scenario.
I thought of that very first session, today, as I've been reexposed to behavior that brings that expression in for a grand slam home run, of sorts. It transcends the whole your parents divorced, this is not your fault impression.
I deared pdoc in this salutation since combined with "this is not your fault" comes his statement of "that was his choice."

Deception...original description of the running through a toll in my registered vehicle after I walked into the airport for my flight for my vacation.
Not accepting responsibility...the response about the fine.
Blaming...yes, the checked box for the type of filed divorce of my stepmother....how he portrayed my late mother last visit and her fault in divorce..as it was in the beginning with a twist.
Only attending therapy long enough to spout off about others, no look in the mirror, no step four...check.

Oh I forget the rest of the new book authors list that differentiated from self assured, confident, mislabeled types.

This dear post is a bit choppy, by virtue of being sleepy and trying to write it out.

Purpose is to mention my therapy came around full circle in thirty years. My therapy has been about learning to cope, discovery of my needs, introspection, assertion and various life skills.
"This isn't my fault, he made a choice. "

-Me