hi samj
i am sorry that you are struggling. i am sorry if i dont get the lingo straight as i am not clear on the anacronyms but i think your mistake is trying to fit into a role if i am understanding this correctly. feeling as if, since you are identifying as male, because you still have your feminine side this somehow makes you a fake is an inaccurate perception. just as the others have told you, being a male, doesnt preclude you from having a feminine side. just because you are biologically female identifying as a male, doesnt mean you have to give up everything about yourself. identity isnt about male/female. it is about being who you are as a whole person. the more balance you have, the better person you are going to be. the happier you are going to be. dont get hung up on the labels. welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome