I myself can relate a lot to what sillykitty just said I don't have a shoplifting addiction but my boyfriend whom I love very, very, much sadly does.

I am not great with money of my own in fact I guess its safe to say I don't truly have respect for it it it often just sits about the house and my mother told me often that I was lucky I was not around people that would take advantage of that well in the last year- 2 years I have. as I said I dearly love my boyfriend but he has a very strong compulsive nature to steal if he is without money of his own.

and he like me has a tendancy of over spending his money and then not having any of his own..... because he did not think it through.

this is hard for me to deal with cause as I have gotten older I have copulated some debts and I am trying as best I can to take hold of myself and my money issues so that I can go on living the kind of life I want without having huge financial burdens hanging over my head about things.

I have started going to see a new therapist which well for me personally I have mixed feeling about her. I think she is provoking me to do things that I might not feel comfterable or proud about. and moving in a better direction.

but some how I end up feeling judged often by her when I go to see her I keep trying to remind my self that possibly this due to I only did just meet her.

and we have meet a grand total of 2 times. I want my boyfriend to come with me to see her so we can start working on issues we have amongst each other. but I am utterly horrified this women will be judgemental of me dating a man with a shop lifting issue and will tell flat out I need to dump him.

and I am not going to do that just cause someone think he is not good for me. Some of the things he does are not things I like but he as a person I love.

this concept is totally and completely lost on him. I know he has the ablity to change cause I have known him for a very long time I and I know he is capable of changing, cause frankly I have seen him do so. And if we want to have a long term relationship we have to do this having kids and having your SO in jail......or setting examples like this its just not something that’s sits well with me.

but he is a good man and I genuinely care about him.....I just think ever since his mother died of colon cancer when he was 19 he picked bad people that encouraged him to do bad things in his life has rubbed off a lot.

he has flat out told me, he choose to associate with ***-holes cause those people would make him stronger.

lol and I can't for the life of me wrap my head around his theory.

can't someone have a backbone without associating with jerks?