Hello: I am here, desperate for advice, guidance, insight. I will be brief: I was married for 13 years to my high school girlfriend (married her at 19). We have two children (22 and 16). She cheated on me and left me with the girls. I am a teacher; I tried my very best to hold it all together, but am depressed and anxious still. I spent ten years celibate, raising the girls and teaching.

Fast forward to the present: I met a wonderful woman; she has two boys (8 and 9) and was going through a messy divorce. We fell in love. We married in May of 2015, after dating for a year and blending our families.

I love her, but am experiencing a slue of problems relating to my formerly being cheated on, and the fact that her boys are NIGHTMARES!

My most pressing issue, currently, is that she works with an ex-boyfriend. They were together for two years, before her marriage. He is her boss! They were sexually involved. She must travel for her job three times a year. She travels with him. She even had him pick her up at our home to travel to the airport together. She travels to Vegas, Texas, California. So, while I am home caring for HER primitive and rude children, she is off with the guy, doing god knows what.

Though I want nothing more than to trust her, I can't shake the mental movies, the fabricated scenarios. My anxiety has never been higher, my depression is at an all time high.

I am newly married. I am supposed to be happy!!! I just can't deal with this travel situation. I really don't know what to do!! He works in her office and I imagine them closing the door and..........

I REALLY love this woman, but am so afraid that either my trust issues, coupled with my depression and anxiety will wear her out, or that I may just run.

Any advice is greatly appreciated.

For a man who was devastated by the collapse of his first marriage, due to her cheating, these events, especially traveling, have presented the greatest challenges I have faced in my 45 years on this planet!!!

Sincerely,

tryingrealhard