Thanks everyone for your thoughtful responses. She is currently looking for another job with less or little travel, and of course not traveling with this person. Her parenting skills are poor, but getting better. She is on board with me: we have instituted behavior charts, chores, routines, etc. They both do horribly in school, especially in the behavior department. Currently, I am in therapy and studying mindfulness and meditation. I feel terrible to put this pressure on her regarding her job. I knew about the travel when we married, but didn't know about the ex thing until after, nor did I realize I would be primary caregiver ALL summer, any breaks from school, or during this trips. I find myself visualizing all of these horrid scenarios, while at the same time caring for her rude, inappropriate children. I love this woman with all of my heart, but issues with her ex-husband (daily), the kids, her job, her anxieties, have caused my own depression and anxiety to resurface in a big way. Well....thanks again. I guess advice is not needed, as much as support.