Hi Coldwut
There are many programs you can join to change your gender (in the US). Most of them require that you have lived your life as a man for some time (their discretion). You are evaluated on a regular basis by a therapist to ensure this is indeed the route you want to take. Make peace with the fact that even though your body changes into a body who's skin "fits", there will still be a few tears for the "she" you left behind.

If you are serious about this you must speak to your parents and inform them of how you feel. Pretend it's a meeting and have your relevant points written down beforehand, try not to digress.

If you're in a program and are changing they will give you the right steroids, so don't just buy testosterone on the black market. You never know what you're buying.

Please don't feel despondent - one way or another you will end up in the gender you were meant to be. Go to Laura's Playground to talk to other transgender/sexual people, LPG has many resources for transpeople and is a safe and reputable place to be.

Remember, you were loved before you were born, your gender or sexual orientation don't change the person your mother gave birth too. It's still you, just a different wrapper.