Quote:
Originally Posted by helpmakingchanges
Want is a need vs. a want? Do I need new glasses? or do I just want new glasses. How does the fact that it's been 7 years since my last pair figure into this? Does it matter that I feel guilty when I spend money, that I've been struggling with employment since graduating from college 7 years ago. Does it matter that things are blurry? Should I just deal with it. What about my "mattress"? The $10 piece of foam I've been sleeping on for the past year and a half. Is that a need or a want. Is it a matter self-care or is it a matter of excessive spending? What about my clothes that don't fit quite right and have holes in them. Need or want? How do I face the guilt of buying new things when I've got so much student loan debt that it feel I'll never get out. How do I look for a new job that could be a step up from my two low wage jobs. Is sleep a need or a want. I dread the switch days. Working one job in the morning, sleeping for a few hours then going to my night shift job. It's hard on my body. I switch from day schedule to night schedule twice a week. Do I need a new job or just want a new job? I think I need a new winter jacket and winter clothes, so I can stay warm and comfortable during the winter. But I feel guilty when I think of buying these things. I have about 10 years of college education. I have skills I can put to use to find a new job, but I'm running around putting out little fires. The guilt from spending money, the depression, the trying but not seeing results. My self efficacy is low.
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tip student loans can be deferred. just contact the loan company and ask them to send you a deferment application. fill in the application, some parts of it may have where a treatment provider must fill it in. if so take it to your treatment provider so they can fill it in. once its completed you mail it in to the loan company. the loan company will look over the application and see if you fit the criteria for their deferment plan. if its through Sallie Mae you might even qualify for a permanent deferment meaning you dont have to pay it back. it gets wrote off and you go on with your life.
how to tell when something is a need vs a want... a need is something that you have to have in order to have the best health and life you can have...food clothing shelter, meds.... for some people yes glasses and other aids so that they can see clearly hear clearly walk, be mobile.
for me my contacts and a good mattress are a necessity. with out my contacts\glasses I run the risk of going blind in other words doing more harm to myself, and because of having MS I need a special mattress in order to be able to function to the best of my abilities for example with out the rising feature on my bed and a mattress that fits this criteria I would be bed ridden. I nether want nor need to be bedridden when I am fully capable of living a full and productive lifestyle of working and taking care of myself and my family.
we cant tell you why or how come you feel guilty only you can say how and why you are feeling the way you are feeling.
my suggestion is sit down and write about the pros and cons and whether you can live with things the way they are or whether you would like to better your life through the use of new glasses and new mattress.
Another suggestion maybe you can contact community organizations. sometimes community organizations and churches can help people to get things like glasses, clothing, furniture at little to no cost depending upon the situation.