If there's anyone that can relate, it would definitely be me.

I'll quote a section of what I posted in my intro post.

"Never had a girlfriend or any kind of relationship. Stopped trying after high school. Been rejected, Ive had an online friend choose another friend over me. For a couple years after high school, I mostly didnt try to care about relationships. But honestly now at 23... never experiencing any kind of love or intimacy... There are no words.... to describe the pain I feel from that void. Not to mention anger, envy and jealousy. Maybe even hate."

I also mentioned in my post how Ive always been a loner kid, was bullied, have an alcoholic parent etc.

So growing up believing most of the time I was never loved as a human being. Or at least felt that way. And lately its been getting the better of me, hence why Im here.

So believe me, I can relate. The feelings of "Why not me? Why can't I be with or have some one? Why must I be alone and suffer in silence?" And I think Ive been learning the more you keep asking yourself those questions, you just feel pain and anger because you dont know the answer. Or the answer wont show itself to you and tell you.
Also the jealousy is not so much of the person or who they are with, but of what they have. Trust me... I get those feelings regardless of who it is, could be a friend or family member.