I'm sorry, I know this is a really confusing thing for you. I've wondered how I'd handle it, too, if it happened to me. I'm ok with cross-dressers, but I am not turned on by it, and I want my man to be manly, if I can put it that way. (That's not to be confused with men who are gross, overly jealous, and do those things some label "macho.")

But if I found out my husband did this, I'd have to learn more about it, which you're doing...I know a bit about it already, so it doesn't freak me out so much as it's not what I'd want in my partner. But some women are really ok with it. You might have to set some boundaries, like if he can cross-dress when you have sex, or is it too much of a turn-off to you (I'm not getting the feeling it's a turn-on, but if it is, that's fine, too), or if you are willing to go out in public with him dressed as a female.

I don't have a lot of answers for you, but I wish you lots of luck, and him, too.