Hi Nadia

I am sorry this is giving you so much difficulty. The thing is, we have to accept the way we look because we are stuck with it and cannot change it. That is the only way to peace of mind. Hating ourselves for it leads nowhere and just brings endless aggravation.
I am old fat and bald something I accept and don't give another thought to.
In any case, it is more the type of person you are that people will relate to much more than physical appearance. Getting therapy for this particularly from CBT or acceptance and commitment therapy, which I use would be helpful. There would be self-help literature for this from the health section of the public library or Amazon.
Then there is Nami the organization for the mentally ill which you can Google, and contact. They run peer-to-peer support groups. And there you will meet some people who have put on considerable weight due to the medication and would understand your problem, and perhaps be able to help. I really hope and pray this improves for you in the future. Take care. God bless and best wishes from your friend Francis