Hi Acceptance

I suppose I first became aware I had depression from studying Hamlet as part of the English literature course at school. The teacher had this theory that he suffered from depression and that seemed very much like what I was experiencing. So I went and saw the family doctor about it and he told me I had depression.
I was open to the idea of medication and indeed anything that would have had the potential to help. And the diagnosis was a kind of comfort in the sense of knowing exactly what was wrong with me.
I think you are showing remarkable determination and perseverance. Keeping going at everything you have to do despite the depression. And don't worry if it is slowing you down. In doing things, it is not the speed that is important, but simply getting them done.
Have you got medication? That could make quite a difference to how you feel as could therapy. CBT and acceptance and commitment therapy a form of mindfulness is very good for depression. You can always Google a therapist for your area. And there would be self-help literature on this in the health section of the public library and on Amazon, allowing you to get the skills necessary to manage depression. Even googling how to manage it on the Internet would bring up some very helpful advice.
I was wondering have you anyone to sit with the kids for you when you go to the gym? I really think making a time for you to go there and simply making yourself go then would be best.
Is there any way that you can organize some time for you to relax and do your favorite things so you can get rid of all of the stress? That would make a huge difference.

If you don't want meds. Having good therapy skills will enable you to control the depression anyway. Don't worry about how much you share with the therapist. They won't act against you, unless you say you are going to kill yourself or someone else. And believe me in their time they have heard absolutely everything you could possibly imagine. And it is important that they have all of the necessary information so that they can give you the help you need. You can always progress in this by degrees sharing each time just a bit more than before. That will allow you to test the water about sharing. Take care. I hope and pray everything improves for you. God bless and best wishes from your friend Francis