Thank you, and of course! I currently have PMS (fun, fun). I told my husband tonight that I never realized how much these medications kept my, what used to be fairly extreme, PMS at bay. I have felt constantly irritated by everything and craving and eating sweets like a ravenous beast. I bring this up because I never thought of it returning. It is certainly manageable though as I have not lost self control. Though I have felt myself irritated with my children, I haven't raised my voice at them and I haven't been harsh with them. I just hope it stays that way. PMS I can handle; hormone induced psychosis I cannot.

Also, I have been extremely, extremely productive. When you are laying on a couch all day for months and months, and on and off for several years like I was, this feels wonderful! I have asked myself if my productivity is the result of changes in me or if it is a symptom of my illness. I'm sure I will continue to battle with this question my life. But, I am sleeping fine and (aside from the PMS, ha!) I don't have a temper. Changes in these are my two biggest and most notable signs of an impending mania so I am in the clear for now.

My anxiety is heightened but that doesn't surprise me in the least. My anxiety has never really subsided. It does appear to be worse at times. The other day, for instance, I read something evil, evil on serial killers. I stumbled across it accidentally and read it curiously but stopped not long after I began as it was so disturbing. I know it would have disturbed anyone, but I felt overly dirty by having read parts of it. I felt as though I had done something wrong in reading it and my anxiety over this would not cease. I had an eery sense of impending doom. How could I have read this? Are there really people that evil in this world? This could happen to me and my family too. All of these things came to mind. I can still get worked up about it if I over think it. I even found myself PLEADING with God to "take this fear from me;" something I haven't done in quite some time. It is difficult to manage.

Anyway, for the most part, I can tell a HUGE difference in my functioning and energy levels minus all of the medications. I feel like myself again and my family keeps saying how nice it is to see me this way. I can't even get over how much better things seem to be. Today, I played and danced with my youngest while my other two were at school, I cleaned out and organized my bedroom (major task...I'm still not done). I just don't know who all of this life and energy is coming from!