I send you a hug, some scented oil for your bath, and some cookies. This is the most wonderful time in your life, you get to meet your baby soon. A real person, with his own distinct personality is going to be blinking up at you soon. You sound really articulate and together, I think you are going to be fine. I remember, there was never a time I needed my Mom more than when I was having my four children. You go back to who you are at your basic being when you have a baby, and I wanted lots of love. My husband had all the emotions I did, and no way to express them. I don't think my alcoholic Mom was ever more of a drama queen, or my Dad more of an enabler than when I had kids. Everyone became a squalling kid and I was the one who wanted to be held. Do what you can, laugh if you can, and then take a time out. No matter what it is going to be wonderful.