I would say stop focusing on chasing " happy"

Make small attainable goals. Yes bipolar can take nice stability and slam it into hell in a half second but coming out of it takes time, and that time does drag on and on.

Are you set up with a new pdoc? Its very likey that you do in fact need a medication adjustment, Its very rare that people find the " right" ones and they last forever..

Dealing with chronic negative thinking is a hard one to manage. Are you seeing a Therapist? Finding a good Therapist to me is just as important for your wellbeing as seeing a Pdoc for medications treatment.

If you make X negative thought turn around and think of a positive. Easier said than done sometimes...

One positive you could use.. I have that beautiful condo in Turkey I can go to.

At one point the only positive that I could come up with is,, " at least my dog is always happy to see me" Kinda sad maybe..... but that is what I clung to like the last life raft when the Titanic went down.

When was the last time you just did something nice for yourself. Favorite food ? A trip to see a Movie? When I am down and struggling I buy a new nail polish! Yeah maybe sounds silly, But its enjoyable for me to find some wild color.. its the little things in life that really are more important that we give them credit for.

And sometimes.... Sometimes its okay to sit back and say Okay my life is really sucking right now.. and just stop fighting and float, Just float sometimes the constant work trying to swim upstream is too much .. Float and give yourself time to rebuild your strength to fight another day.

I hope you are able to find ways to feel better