Can anybody relate?

I come from a dysfunctional family where after tremendous research, have concluded that I'm the scapegoat in the family. I've even heard comments before that I'm crazy (by my father). The point is my ENTIRE LIFE I have tried to do good acts to get my family's approval but I still get a sense they think I'm the bad apple or the crazy one. Out of my whole family I've had the most education - after school, I've been to many colleges and university where I got a degree. I work in the teaching profession where I do good work, I pay my taxes and have no criminal record. But even then I don't feel valued. Sometimes I feel like I've murdered someone with how people shun me and people view me with derision. What makes it more crazy is that everybody adores my mother and she is placed on a pedestal. She never does anything wrong and it is all about keeping her happy - her feelings are paramount to everybody else's.

No matter what I do, I never feel 'good enough'. I feel I can never be ok and must always try that little harder to get their approval. But I never win especially when I do believe that one of my sisters is undertaking a smear campaign against me. Why do I say that? Because people that use to talk to me (that she also knows), don't talk to me anymore. I am the 'unseen' because if these people that I call 'family', saw me the way my friends see me, I would get respect and attention.

Is anybody else going through what I'm going through and feel that they are the 'unseen' also? Please reply.

PH