Thanks everyone, for the feedback.
Quote:
Originally Posted by WrkNPrgress
I'll tell you what a therapist told me once when I started to go down these kinds of self-defeating assumptions about other people's actions; " No offense, but it's not always all about you." It sounds harsh to say but sometimes it needs to be said. People have a 101 reasons for doing things. Your T presumable sees a lot of clients all day long, why would you assume she's changed her outfits just for one?  |
In the light of day, fueled by a solid three hours of sleep, I looked back at what I'd written and did feel kind of silly.That
did sound paranoid and self-centered. But then, with my feelings toward her I actually do want it to be all about me (and am jealous of her other clients, especially the males). It's hard for me to accept that I carry these kinds of cognitive distortions around in my head because I like to believe that I know my own mind and
know what the reality surrounding me is. It frightens me to think that I'm wrong and in fact am not seeing things clearly.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Red75
Tbh, she might not have shaved her legs! That's why I tend to check skirts. Also, the change to jeans might be cos of the weather?
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It's definitely not the weather, with the kind of summer we've been having where I am I'd think she'd have made the opposite switch....
Quote:
Originally Posted by Inner_Firefly
I'm sorry you are triggered to feel worried. I understand not wanting to make your T uncomfortable or creeped out, and worrying about putting people off, and getting rejected. From reading your posts here I feel like you are a very nice, considerate, likeable and thoughtful person. I imagine your T probably has her own reasons based on comfort, style, fashion trends, moods, and other things that we cannot think of. For example it's hard to go to the washroom with a long skirt, it touches everything, gathers cooties, and gets dipped into the toilet bowl. Perhaps the skirt makes her skin rub together but pants prevent skin rub. Probably it's not because of you; you were not staring. Still, it brought up these bad feelings inside of you, would you consider sharing them with her? It may help her to get to know you better, and bring you closer in this relationship? Sending you good thoughts. |
Thank you. I like to think that someday I'll have the guts enough to bring up my issues relating to her, but am not there yet. We have begun to get into my fears about turning people off which is a very tough thing for me to talk about. I often feel like we both know damn well about my feelings for her but neither of us want to bring them up.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chummy
I have this too. I keep a distance from people and I don't touch or hug them unless they take the initiative. I'm afraid other people find me disgusting.
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It's been my observation that people who are self-aware enough to fear that they are disgusting very rarely are in reality. (Of course, I'm always the last person who's able to listen to my own advice.)