I'm so sorry for your struggle I.Am.The.End. *hugs* I'm going through a similar situation with my husband.

He used to be so good at getting me off that I could have an orgasm without him even touching me. Our sex life when we first got together, and for the first few years of marriage, was bliss. I was always hot and ready to go, and we always had fun.

But slowly something changed, and I started to enjoy myself less and less. From my perspective, it seems like sex is a race for him to get to "the good part". Getting to the peak of pleasure now seems to take forever for me, requiring lots of build up and teasing, and it's like he's lost the patience for it or something. Trying to guide him, or tell him what I want in terms of faster/slower/type of touch/etc does not help. In fact, it seems to do the opposite and take all the wind out of his sails, and take all the enthusiasm out of him. It just ends up with me on my back, him laying next to me up on his side, one arm under his head, the other hand on my clit, just rubbing back and forth with this bored look on his face. I can't enjoy myself at all if he's projecting this air of being bored or frustrated with it.

Is it so much to ask that he make me feel like he WANTS me to enjoy myself? I just want some passion. But when it's him trying to give me pleasure, it just feels like it's a chore to him. He just wants to get to the "good part" and be able to **** me already.

In trying to see things from his perspective, I'm sure it must make him feel bad that he isn't able to turn me on like he used to. I'm sure he feels like a failure that nothing he does works for me. But that doesn't mean he should stop trying! I haven't stopped trying, I keep working hard to be a better spouse and a better lover, but it just isn't working anymore. I have no idea what to do, and this is the saddest feeling I've ever known.

Sigh. I'm sorry, I'm sure my rant doesn't help your situation at all. But please know you're not alone, and this isn't your fault.