Sometimes it is hard to find the point in all of this suffering. Sometimes I wonder myself what is the point? I am also a Christian. I believe Jesus loves me and has a purpose for me even if I can't see it right now. I think when I have felt the suicidal urge I would stop and think of the reasons I need to stay here. I thought I have to stay here for my dog, my children, the handicapped people I work with at church.

It seems true that depression always seems to be a battle. I find myself arguing with myself. It is tiring.

I wish I had a good answer outside of therapy and medication, and even that takes a while to help. Know that I care and you are in my thoughts and prayers. Stay safe.