I am about to begin what is, supposedly, my last year before I graduate.
Since I started attending at university it has been 5 years. Five years sharing a school with the same people, but I still realize frequently that the idea they have about me is far from who I really am. Obviously I am not very close to any of them. But they think they know me.
I use to hang with some guys, that I don't hate, but don't like either. The other classmates would rapidly vanish after classes, not caring about me, and these guys were the only ones that would stay around until the next class. So I waited with them.
But this was two years ago. I started getting away from them because I was always ending up in their group even if I didn't want. I stopped hanging with them, I would be in other people groups, when a working group was needed. But it looks nobody noticed.
When last year, in a certain discipline, I was left out of any group , I ask some classmates if I could join them, and it was OK by them. But at the same time a couple of classmates that were handling the group distribution had already decided, without asking me that I was going to be with the same guys I used to. I said I didn't want, that I preferred to be with the other classmates I had ask. But even so the couple posted the definitive groups, for every body to see, and I still was in the guys group, after I asked tobe in a different one. It was only after I told them that I really didn't want to be there and told them the other group I wanted didn't mind have me around for sure (I had to asked again) that the couple change it.
Now the same couple think they know everybody so well that they can make the groups themselves without asking. And as they learnt I didn't like to be with those guys, now they put me in the group of people I hate (they are those type of person who think they know important people and they are better than the others). I don't want to make a fuss again telling them it is ok to be in the same group as those guys, if there are other people there beside them.
After an erroneous conception about me, I was able to make it, so they were even more wrong about me. How could I for once trying to impose my will, get in an even worse situation. How would I look if I said I don't like to be with these people too, even more picky. Picky, and making my away to be with someone else that doesn't want me around either.
Now as they put together the people I wanted to be with those guys I didn't, I can't be with the people I want.
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