I think three dates is too early to be having discussions about whether or not you have a relationship. You may be totally right and he does want one but is just shy, but I just think it's too soon to ask in terms of dating etiquette.

If you want to kiss him, try kissing him on the cheek at the end of your next date.

The whole situation that you've described is frustratingly ambiguous. (Not your description - the situation is.) It seems impossible right now to tell if he's interested but shy, interested but has a problem with compliments and initiating physical touch, interested but scared, etc.

Good luck.