it's hard b/c your brain is trained to put up with this specific (unhealthy) reality.

Why not start small? Tell him you care for him but need some time away - try a week at your mother's first (or somewhere where you can RELAX, feel FREE, & think things through), then a month, then more! He needs to get his act together - this is 'toxic'

While away, think about what you would like for YOU? Do things with your daughter! Go out togerther, a park ...library (low cost stuff) a nice cafe for a cup of coffee. Spend time away from the chaos. You need to love him at arms' length if you can't let go, - b/c if you don't this WILL destroy you in the future. Where will you daughter be? She NEEDS you!!! - she doesn't have the other parent. Not really.

Start small, watch your self talk & get busy to help distract you. You can do it!