God you seem to know me very well didgee, where are you getting any of this from? When do I complain about my life on here? How do you know anything about my life? I'm very lucky to be in the position I'm in, a better position than most on here and am very high functioning so don't tell me "I want to be psychotic to escape life" how dare you? Do you even know what psychosis is like? Why would anyone want that or are you projecting your own feeling outward.