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Old Sep 08, 2015, 02:53 PM
Achy Turtle Armor's Avatar
Achy Turtle Armor Achy Turtle Armor is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Jul 2013
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,100
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chummy View Post
Dear Pdoc

I miss you so much. 7 weeks is so long. I'm still not sure if it wouldn't be better to quit. I've been thinking that for months. Now it isn't because of the anxiety that I want to quit. It's because I'm thinking about you all the time. It's exhausting. When I think about you, I get sad because I can't be with you, jealous because there might be a woman who can be with you, anxious because I'm afraid I will always be alone. I feel lonely. I'm hurting. I'm tired. I feel ugly. I feel worthless. But I can really feel it in my body. I don't know how to describe it, but it's not a pleasant feeling.
I don't know if not seeing you anymore would help. Maybe it's ''out of sight, out of heart''. Maybe I will slowly get over you. Or maybe I will keep thinking about you for a very long time and I will be very heartbroken that I won't see you anymore.
I just want to stop feeling so bad.
I hope it is OK to write about what I read. That feels like I could have written it. My history does say out of sight out of mind but my history also finds me doing the same thing with someone else. It is exhausting.
__________________
...In the darkness I will meet my creators And they will all agree, that I’m a suffocator
-Daughter
Hugs from:
Bipolar Warrior, Chummy, LonesomeTonight