I feel so sad. Too much crying. I don't want this to be the story of this pregnancy. I don't know what to do. My thoughts are so selfish and unrealistic and impossible - I feel like I just want to run away. Feel like I need some sort of circuit breaker. I watched a doco today and there was a scene where a family came together and supported each other during a crisis - it was so amazing - I'm not comparing. I'm not in a crisis - but when I have been, I haven't had that. And now I'm scared, this pregnancy is scary, the future with these babies is terrifying - but everyone's excited and I feel like I'm supposed to be too. I want them now but I'm still scared of them. Maybe I'm just hormonal. Solomon's been sick again this week and Jordan's gone camping. Maybe I just have a 'Perth hangover'? I don't know. Tell me what to do and I'll do it.