Quote:
Originally Posted by JaneTennison1
Everytime I read a post you write about new T I smile for you. I am happy it sounds like new T really knows what she is doing. Transference feels awful at times but also know there is nothing wrong with you for developing it and I hope old T's reaction to it hasn't added shame to the pile of feelings you have. Working on it may be very healing.
You tried it with old T for a year and it didn't work, maybe this new style can do something for you?
|
What a sweet thing to say.
I'm not sure how much experience she has with it, but she's willing to have a plan and knows it shouldn't be so intense. She wants me to see the plan and will know when we need to call in someone else but more as an addition instead of replacing her.
Yes, I totally have the shame even though I know I can't help it. It is such a crazy feeling. I really think old T. was just too much like my mom in her personality and her reactions. Unfortunately, we would probably get along great outside therapy. We have similar sense of humor and like to tease each other. I'll miss so much but I won't miss my intense feelings.
Current T. said to know it's not my fault but then the last session she got upset that I had seen another T. in May for advice and didn't want me seeing anyone before my last session with her. I wish she had said "I know this will be really hard for you. What can I reasonably do to make it easier". That probably hurts more than anything.