Although I only drink about once a year now I used to be a very heavy drinker, it always eased my pain both physical and mental. I started drinking when I just started walking as my parents, their friends and my oldest brother always had open beers everywhere and I loved the taste (my mom told me about this). I felt abandoned and alone always and I quickly noticed that drinking made me feel less alone.
The final clincher it seemed was the same day I was set on fire in a gas explosion, I had just turned 6. I caused the explosion myself. Anyway I was screaming in pain non-stop so my dad gave me a double shot of whiskey. That is a lot of alcohol for someone so young and I quickly passed out. I remember every second of that accident and I really remembered that whiskey was an instant pain killer.

Before you ask I don't know why my parents did not take me to the hospital and the only scars I have from being burned are scars on my fingers where I was holding the jar of gasoline, and of course the mental scars.

Sometimes I weep for that little boy and for the alcoholic he turned into.