Hello all, I am married to a woman who recently has said that she no longer finds me sexually attractive, and that while still in love with me is not in love with me. We have been together for 21 years and married 15 of those years.

In another post I have described what is going on so I don't want to rehash that. What I am wondering is how to go about choosing a good marriage counselor, one who will actually make suggestions instead of just asking "well how does that make you feel". I don't know if that is actually what happens but my wife had some therapy which did not help her at all because nothing was said to her about how to deal with her issues.

This may be more or less a nonsensical question as I know I can just search the web for local counselors but my intent is to see some response on what good qualifications are for this type of counseling. My wife an I are not religious and do not want to bring god into this. From what I have seen so far a lot of the councilors are or have been beckons in the religious community. Is this just how it has to be because of the nature of the counseling?