My abuse was an on going event, but what gets to me the most is Christmas. I think that is when the abuse was the worse. I have decided to let myself do whatever I want over Christmas—not celebrate it really. I often go to Bermuda or Jamaica or Mexico. I get out and get away. Of course, some years it has been impossible to do that because of lack of funds. Luckily, I have a friend in Bermuda so going there is almost free.

But, when I can’t get away, I am forced to think about it a little more. I give myself permission to do whatever I need to do to take care of myself. I come before any of the family obligations. I do everything possible to keep the stress down. Sometimes, believe it or not, I actually go to work—it helps keep my mind occupied with other things.

I don’t consider this running away from my problems—I consider it taking care of myself. Sometimes, I do feel okay and I am able to celebrate a fairly normal Christmas, but sometimes I need to just focus on myself.

By focusing on myself I do not mean reliving the experience—I mean the opposite—concentrating on the positives in life. Anything that is more positive than the abuse—even work is better than the abuse.

Therapy and time have helped heal the wounds. It is possible to get better—matter fact, it is important to know that you can get better.

PM me if you ever want to talk