Yes I do see a difference between the two views. If it were about being a virgin, there could be significant social aspects to the humiliation--you could see yourself as one of a very few virgins, you could feel humiliated because you see yourself as behind others, looked down upon, left out.

What I think you are saying, though, is that there really is not a major social dimension to your feelings of humiliation. You find sex itself to amount to someone using your body for his own purposes, to relieve and gratify himself. And so you find sex itself to seem violating. You could give a man full permission, but it sounds like sex would feel like a violation nonetheless.

How well and how accurately does what I just said resonate with you?