Thanks for the above post. Existential questioning doesn't make me comfortable. I don't understand it very well, and it feels difficult to reach any valid conclusions, but I am fine with the questioning itself. I used to do more of it when I was younger, but I think my brain has gotten middle-aged and prefers more concrete types of reasoning now.

I was mostly asking about your comment that "And if I ever found evidence to refute this, it would break me." I was wondering why finding out that what you've written isn't true would "break you".

I think I would be fine with either situation, but I'm a fence-sitter by nature. I have a special padded chair to make my philosophical fence-sitting even more comfortable.