Developing a healthy relationship without dependency can be difficult. I wish I could say don't be scared but I know it would be a wasted breath because I knew I was scared to death when I was going through it. Dependence can be like a glue that holds you to your love one even when you are angry at them for doing something stupid. I have trouble decerning anger from hate. I would be mad at my husband but think that I hated him. I thought I was over that confusion but I found last week that I had the same thoughts with my son...Anyway...so sometimes there are feelings we have that make us shut ourselves off from those people we love, if we are dependent on those people then we don't have to figure out what is going on with our feelings because the relationship will go on regardless of how we are feeling because we just can't break it off.

NOW, the cool thing about not being dependent on your love one is that you learn to maintain the relationship through all those grand troublesome feelings. You learn to set boundries and how to talk about what is going on inside. Also it becomes much easier to talk about the things that drive you nuts about your partner and vise versa because you are not afraid of losing the person. If you are not dependent and your partner is not dependant then you are in the relationship because you both REALLY WANT TO BE THERE so the fear of losing one another fades and what remains is something beyond safe, it is like being wrapped in a warm blanket and knowing that everything will be all right even though you are fighting, or that you are seperated because someone went on a trip. I don't know if the independence you are feeling is you growing in your comfort in your relationship or not but the fact that this feeling came as you were making your website has me wondering if that act of making the website helped you to see how important he was too you and how important you are to him so you became safer in your relationship and felt less need for the dependence that you now crave.
Just a couple of thoughts,
Carrie

<font color=green>Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door.--Emily Dickenson