I totally get what you're saying, meow. When therapy gets to that point, it helps to have a therapist that's open to between session contact. With a good therapist, it can be done well.

Also, thank you for your honesty with this post. You've always come across as someone with an impenetrable shell. For all the pain, something is working right for you in your therapy. Being human and hurting is hell, but the deepening of compassion and empathy is not a bad side effect.