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bellaviolet said:
gotta say i don't feel too strong or courageous, i feel like a coward, i've always been a coward...

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Don't you realize that it is natural for a child NOT to be "strong" or "courageous"? Even as adults we cannot cope with dangerous situations without knowledge and training, and it takes time to obtain those. We are not Superman. Not "made of steel". That's OK, too, IMO. In fact, that's GOOD.