Well, your trust in him has definitely been shattered. It is for you to decide now whether you prefer to stay with him still and seek counselling for him- and then watch him closely for its benefits, if any- or to part ways with him. But, take heart, and do not entertain suicidal thoughts at all; suicide is not, and cannot be, the solution to this mess. Maybe somebody very close to you can provide solace in this regard- if you want to share this, that is. But if your own condition gets worse do not hesitate to approach a therapist. I wish you well!