Wow, I have to say that you have captured what my inner dialogue is quite frequently. Are you living in my head?

Since all we've ever known is a world where wishing we no longer existed on a daily basis is part of everyday life, we see it as "normal". Everyone deals with this, right? It's funny, on an intellectual level I've known for most of my life that most likely wasn't true, that I wasn't quite "normal". But hey, what's the big deal!

It's very strange to actually speak, out loud, the thoughts that pervade our mind. That sense of shame is so strong. I feel like a dumb whiney baby half the time.

Even in these forums I feel like my issues ("my issues" is really my euphemism for mental illness....I don't think I've ever said out loud to any to anyone that I'm mentally ill) are so minor. That even discussing them would be a waste of anyone's time.

You certainly aren't alone.

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