When I was growing up I rejected my mother, I pushed her away when she tried to hug me. I'm not entirely sure I understand why I did this other than I didn't feel that it was real. My mother made me feel really terrible about my rejection of her. My brother would run up and jump into her arms. Though I rejected her I sought out a mother figure through teachers, an aunt, and when I got older, some older friends. As for my father, I don't recall any hugging at all and yet I don't seek out a father figure. I suspect some of this had to do with my very strict religious upbringing.

So when you say you don't feel loved by your parents even though they say they love you, I completely understand this. I don't feel it either, never have and I still don't as an adult. My parents tell me that they miss me and somehow that just doesn't feel real to me either.

It's definitely something that needs to be explored in therapy, something I have yet to do and need to because I have no feelings of love toward my parents at all.