I am at my friend's place currently keeping an eye on her to stop her from killing herself. We met in hospital and both got discharged on the same day and have spent a lot of time together.

The whole time she has been struggling with suicidal thoughts but I didn't realise, she admitted she lied to get discharged from hospital. It's got worse this week after her gf broke up with her. We ended up in A&E on Tuesday night because of how bad she was feeling, they let her go and hoped to try to manage it in the community with the crisis team. They want to admit her because she isn't working with them but she refused. So I'm staying with her until the people turn up to assess her under the mental health act and most likely section her.

I find it very weird to be in this situation. Only two months ago I was in the same state, couldn't listen to reason, couldn't see any way forward. And now I'm probably feeling the best I have in several years. Which I am so grateful for as I probably wouldn't be able to cope with this right now otherwise.

I'm aware that this is having some affect on my mood though. I'm trying to just push through and not let my mind wander in a bad direction. So I'm just venting here trying to make sense of everything in my own head.