Discover, I too appreciate the analogy of Ghosts. It's very much the same for me. I'm stuck in a cycle because of things that happened to me over and over again growing up. I see the scars on my face and body every day and I feel the pain of broken vertebrae every time I stand. But those are nothing compared to the internal communication I have telling myself that there's something about me that is always wrong, that I'm no good, remembering the people who have wronged me, feeling like a failure. It's an everyday battle, wanting to feel normal, to feel like I'm "Ok". I wish I had an answer to give you, but I can only encourage you to keep focusing on the good and fill your life with successes, no matter how trivial they may seem. I try to be sure I do at least one good thing for someone else, a stranger even, and one good thing for me every day. It helps to affirm that you're a good person.