I'm a black sheep myself, but you are not the devil! far from it. You're a great, strong, stubborn unstoppable (I hope, anyway) struggling human being-- and you deserve a lot of good, much more than you currently have in your life. But it will get better; I have a lot of faith in time and working at it--and I know you are, determinedly, despite all the doubts and seeming setbacks.

I wish you could see how far from the truth all those thoughts and accusations, and self-accusations are.

Sorry I've been missing you on Babblechat. Maybe we'll be there together soon.

Balzac (Honore)