My socially unfulfilling life leads to depression. I was doing weed for a few weeks to escape from the depression but it gave me psychosis. So I learned that drugs are especially unsafe for my brain even though they are very tempting when I'm feeling especially pointless and under-stimulated.

Lately it has been sexual frustration and thoughts of self harm. I haven't thought of cutting for many many years, but I've been wanting to. Increasing sense of desperation and recklessness.