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Originally Posted by Myladymylady
My husband has always had a mild addiction to porn but in the last few years it seems to have grown and gotten worse. My grown daughter and three kids have moved back in with us while going through a divorce and getting on her feet. The other morning I caught my husband peeping in the window at the oldest "19" while she was taking a shower and when confronted he admitted that he'd been doing this for the last few months at both she and my daughter. I am devastated. This is my daughter and granddaughter but the granddaughter whom he was watching views him as her grandfather since she was born. We are both in our sixties. He says he is ashamed and he doesn't know why he did it and he will get help because he's sick, but I don't know what to do. My granddaughter had two important men in her life her father whom she's dis-owned because of the divorce and the way he treated her and her Mother and now I'm going to have to tell her, her Grandfather is a pervert and watched her shower. I just want to die. My heart is so broken. I thought he was a good man and loved me and I truly trusted him. Can someone please help me with this?
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My Lady; I am sorry about your husband and his lewd behavior. As someone that has had a porn addiction for many years, I can some what empathize. However spying on your granddaughter or your daughter, is crossing the line of fantasy; which he probably fantasized about first. I have my fantasy life but I never let it get beyond my mind, unless I have a partner to share it with that is willing to go there. (Not saying I fantasize about spying on my own flesh and blood, I just have other things that turn me on that I keep to myself but with a willing partner will explore, just like I will explore theirs.) Now for how to treat the issue at hand. Treat it openly and with dignity. I am sure he feels like a heal because he was caught, and maybe he wanted to be caught, because he knew how wrong it was. Sit down with all how are involved and try to talk it through with out blame or anger. I am sure you love your husband and it sounds as though you have been married for a long while. I think if you are all honest about this with each other it may come to a good resolution. However there may be some mistrust and resentments there as well, but that is to be expected. He still is a loving caring individual, he just let himself get caught up and let himself indulge where he shouldn't have. If you love him and I bet you do, you will continue to love and care for him. But also love your daughter and granddaughter and protect their interests. I hope that this helps and I believe you need to protect all parties in this but don't just end a marriage like someone suggested because he was weak. We all are weak, help him to be strong, treat him with dignity and love him; he may surprise you. He will probably beg forgiveness and that is good, forgive but don't forget.
