Hi NoMoreMeNow,

I hope and suspect that you have fresh air to breath now, food to eat, you can see, hear, feel, taste and touch things. When I feel bad, I live in my senses for a while and in the present moment. In your place, the first thing I would do is tons of exercise and going for looooooong walks.

Many many people have been where you are and have gone on to be just fine. In fact, sometimes people have sudden breakthroughs when thoughts like what you are having now become intolerable. A good question from Eckart Tolle about situations like this is "What is the problem NOW" (not 10 minutes from now, but exactly now). He wants you to live in the now, where everything is actually OK. Many of the kind and helpful people on this site say things like "I'm sorry about your challenges". There is wisdom in these words, because once you totally accept the current state of affairs, you'll find that you can move on and even be inspired by facing whatever comes next in your life.

You might find these notes helpful:

http://egg.bu.edu/~youssef/SNAP_CLUB...0164151576.pdf

It takes a little practice, but there is something in those notes that can let you escape from the thoughts that are tormenting you right now.

- vital