I went through that with my mom when I first started driving - so did I - she clung to the seat and dashboard and winced and tutted. At least it was my own car, a very decrepit Renault where a few more dents meant little.

First driving instructor was a dork, but the seconds was good.

Perhaps you could get your own car so you get used to it driving round with a friend (to stay legal), and jack in nasty instructors for one who knows how to treat you.