I have had a problem with alcohol all my life and I am 42 years old. For a time in my 20s I used to be a more stereotypical alcoholic, physically addicted to it and drinking all day. Now I only drink between 7pm and midnight, and the addiction is psychological. Quite often I will have half a bottle of whisky on an evening. Sometimes its a 4 pack of beer.

Food is an issue also - I am obese and binge eat.

I have given up trying to stop overeating and drinking. The drinking is the priority and I might be able to do a week without drink, in fact I usually miss out one day a week. But I can't sustain sobriety in the long term. And there is no point trying to moderate my food without tackling alcohol as they go together.

I drink to give me relief from difficult emotions. I have many stressors in my life (work/family etc) and these come and go but the person inside doesn't change much. I usually feel really angry, ashamed, guilty, anxious, sad - and above all isolated. Its strange when you feel alone even though you live with your family (wife and children). I don't feel the same as other people, I feel like I am quite different inside. And I need people but I can't cope with them. I am over-sensitive to everything. My moods are very volatile. I find all of this incredibly hard to cope with.

I find alcohol and food at the end of the evening gives me that buzz, it helps me to get through the day knowing I am going to get it. But its expensive (alcohol is taxed heavily here in the UK) and very bad for your health.

I have had several years of therapy: mainly person centred counselling and psychodynamic. I also take an antidepressant (citalopram).

I have resigned myself to continuing to drink and overeat but I am scared of dying early or ending up with very poor physical health .