Aww ((((Tao)))).

Hope you make it through the night ok...

You say yourself that you see that life is getting better a little with your meds...why not give them a chance?

Please don't kill yourself, I don't know you but it would upset me.

I mean...you have the strength to fight through this, ok? Don't give up now! Ring some suicide hotlines, or a friend... go here. Get in contact with your mother! Try not to be alone...go to the library, or go to a bar or something, where you're surrounded by people.

I know what it's like to feel in danger and to feel like you're going to do something and to be afraid to be alone. Oh Tao I'm so sorry for you. Hopefully going to the hopsital will help you. But if they refuse to admit you...please don't see that as desertion! Please live through the night...

Please PM me and tell me how things stand with you.