Of course you’re not bad for wanting to go twice. If you can afford it and it is helping you, by all means keep going.

As for not knowing what to do. You write explicitly that both sessions are helpful for you (help you find strength, life preserving & comfortable - to use your words). So, please don’t give up on therapy nor on the 2nd session.

As for T’s true motives. Hard to know what is really in someone else’s head but from the conversation you reported here, it doesn’t seem like T wants to get rid of you. Instead, he seemed to be checking-in with you as in: ‘am i / is the second session helping you?’ From this perspective, if you tell him - and confirm - they are indeed helping, i don’t think he’d take this away (as that would be cruel)...

I would still discuss your fears with him though (i.e. the perceived rejection and ensuing feelings of hurt this triggered within you).