Why do you say it is more frightening to do it rarely? Sorry about not understanding. I do get how it is pretty effective in the self-punishment department. So what kinds of things do you punish yourself over? Must be pretty bad if it is few and far between. Only thing about it being a way to deal with the rage and guilt towards self is that it becomes a rewarding behavior (meaning we feel better afterwards and therefore more likely to keep repeating it to get the same feeling). Then the more we do it, the more it becomes our go to. Sounds like you have some other ways of coping though, which can be good so long as not harmful to self. I hope for you to find a way to be kind to yourself, and allow yourself the opportunity to learn and grow instead of taking it out on your body.