Quote:
Originally Posted by borncatastrophe77
So I have a question for you all. I have BPD, anxiety, and depression.
There is a very serious issue I have with memory. I hate to be graphic but there are certain sexual things that I've apparently done with guys in my past that I don't remember doing. Like I swear on my life that I didn't do them. But after having conversations with them, seperately of course, they confirmed that I did. They were not cohersed into saying these things. They said them on their own. I would remember if I did certain things with them, but I don't.
It makes me feeling absolutely lost.like really lost and confused. I've looked into the possibility of dissassociative disorder, but I truly believe I don't have alters. I do act differently at work, then I do at home but it's not to the extreme of having an alter.
I'm just so confused.
Any one who can offer any thing. ...please do
|
first let me tell you something that jumped out at me in your post...the word disassociative...
Im wondering if you meant dissociative.. you see in my location what you wrote (disassociative)means to purposely and consciously stop doing something...
example I just disassociated from watching TV meaning I purposely while fully aware and capable of making that decision and action shut the tv off.
Im guessing since you posted here in the dissociative boards you meant the same thing as my locations word ...dissociative..
so going on that my reply is dont worry about not having alters. just because someone is dissociative does ....not....mean they have to have alters, in fact most do not. only a small percentage of people who dissociate have alters.
heres why...dissociation is a completely normal thing to do. its a reaction to a trigger. a trigger is anything negative or positive that causes a person to dissociate.
in normal every day life a human being dissociates because of all kinds of things.....they are bored, hungry, tired, stressed out...gosh there are so many normal reasons why a person can dissociate. by dissociate I mean space out, forget things they have said and done while stressed out, tired, what have you. feel numb, feel disconnected....
directly related to your problem...well only your treatment providers or one in your off computer location can tell you whether what you went through is normal for you or is any number of other medical or mental problems or is a dissociative disorder. we dont diagnose others problems here.
my suggestion is if this continues to bother you contact a treatment provider, they can help you to discover what this is and why it happened to you and how to treat it so that it doesnt happen again.