I think that you need to talk to your therapist today. It sounds like you are really suffering. I know it's hard to trust someone when you are overwhelmed by these feelings but try and trust your therapist at least for the time necessary so you can get over this hump. When you are feeling better later, you can decide whether you want to continue with this particular T. or not but for right now, trust her enough to call. You are not trusting her with your entire life, even though it may feel like that. You are trusting her enough to help you out of this situation of intense pain. Please try and call. It is better than being in pain.